Archive for the ‘Parent’ Category

"30 SOMETHING GRANDMAS"

Monday, November 14th, 2011

Hi Everyone,

Legacy 4 Kids Foundation has been asked to help…we are looking for “30 SOMETHING GRANDMAS”!

Are you in your 30′s and you’ve just become a grandmother?
 Do you have an incredible story to tell about being a 30 something grandma?
 A major cable network is looking for 30 something women whose daughters (or sons) have recently become pregnant, or have already had a child, to star in a new docu-soap reality series!

This series will follow the real life drama of women in their 30′s who have recently found themselves in the role of “Grandma.” Is your new role in life unexpected? Are you thrilled? Maybe a little disappointed? Were you shocked? Did you have something else planned for your life, but right now have to put that on hold?
If this sounds like you, then you’re the perfect candidate for our show!

SEEKING
-Women in their 30′s who have recently or are about to become grandmothers
-Daughter and grandchild must live with you or very nearby
-Must be a legal US resident

*Compensation will be provided for the families who are chosen to appear in the series!*

If you or someone you know would be interested, please contact our office to discuss details.

Kelly@Legacy4kids.com

Making the Grade – A+ Parents

Wednesday, October 5th, 2011

-By Karen Deerwester, Ed.S.

Did you ever wonder how well you’re
 doing at this thing called parenting? Do you have adequate knowledge to make 
important decisions? Have you done enough research to support your positions?
 Will the choices you make today bring about the results you expect tomorrow?
Parenting requires a giant leap of faith but it isn’t a great mystery what
 children really need.

A+
Parents Take Time

Children need parents who are “there”, listening and available in
 kid-time. You never know when a child will really need you – to share their 
fears, ask meaning-of-life questions, or to just feel their hand in yours.
Parents need to be flexible and on-call just in case – every day. Traveling
 parents and 10-hour-work-day parents can create daily check-in routines that
 communicate “I’m here for you” too.

A+ parents must also make time to 
take care of themselves. A family doesn’t work if the children’s needs are met
 but the adults in the family are left wanting. Yes, it’s a constant balancing 
act – but a necessary one.

A+
Parents Teach

Children need guidance to grow well. Your child is forming lifelong attitudes
 about learning from you above all the other teachers in his life. A+ parents
 honor a child’s sense of wonder. The world is a fun and exciting place waiting
 to be discovered by your child.

A+ parents also teach children the
 value and responsibility of social interactions. Your child is learning how to
 get along with others. She needs to be taught social courtesies and how her
behavior affects others.

A+ parents also teach children about
 a sense of self through feelings and experiences. Home is where you expose your 
full emotional life. Children need help understanding that difficult emotions
 are part of humanity. They need to feel safe and loved through all of life’s
 ups and downs.

A+
Parents Learn

Parents are always learning from their children and with their children. A+
 parents know that as soon as you figure out one stage of development, your 
child moves into a new more complicated stage. Uncertainty and resilience are
 your friends. Successful parents are those who are growing in the process.

A+
Parents Forgive

Parenting is about the relationship with each of your children far more than it 
is about getting “it” right. Relationships, like The Velveteen 
Rabbit, aren’t always perfect and new. All successful parents need to embrace
 imperfection in themselves and in their children. Mistakes will always be a 
part of day-to-day parenting.

What’s
 your grade?

The only grade you get for days and years of parenting is the smile on your 
child’s face, that small glow in your heart that says this is worth it, and
 that content feeling in your gut that says you did the best you know. And 
there’s always extra credit given for effort!

Meet Karen here on Thursday Oct. 20, 2011 at 6pm PST for our ESCAPE program module regarding Entitlement – Raising confident and responsible kids in a “me, mine, now!” culture.

Karen Deerwester is the owner of Family Time Coaching & Consulting, writing and
 lecturing on parenting and early childhood topics since 1984. Karen is also the 
Mommy & Me director at The Ruth and Edward Taubman Early Childhood Center
at B’nai Torah Congregation in Boca Raton.

Help Us Make a Difference in a Young Girls Life

Monday, October 3rd, 2011

Do you or someone you know have a young daughter? Perhaps they as parents are facing some troubles trying to figure out what is going on in her world. You are worried she may not be listening to the right messages. It’s so easy to lose track of time. One day she is 4 and concerned about Barney, the next moment she is concerned about who she will go to homecoming with. Not to mention her dress!

 

Well, Legacy 4 Kids wants to help. We are a group of experts that have come together to make a difference. We want to help parents and guardians create a solid foundation for our young girls to count on. We want them to be safe and live in peace in this world to create a new generation that do not have to live in fear or chaos.

 

Face it. It is different today. Some ways better, some worse, but very scary if you are a parent anticipating your little girl growing up. All you want is to give her a safe world to grow up in, but everywhere you turn there is turmoil. Kids are facing bullying, depression, unplanned pregnancy, abduction, date rape, drugs and so many issues and mixed messages thrown at them at such a young age.

 

Do you watch TV and wonder what ever happened to our nations innocence? Do you wonder why the young girls at your daughter’s school all seem to look 5 years older than they are? Do you dread school clothes shopping because all the stuff looks like it should of been thrown out in the eighties?

 

Legacy 4 Kids Foundation is determined to help. We are a nonprofit group dedicated to helping families with young children navigate the pitfalls of our society. Not everyone can afford healthcare, counseling or coaching. We are here to help.

 

Please help us help families before it is too late.

 

 

Legacy 4 Kids Foundation Pre- Holiday Season Fundraising Campaign

$15,000 in 15 days

 

Please Donate!

 

Let’s raise $15,000 in 15 days to prevent teen crises, launch new programs, and support ongoing programs in 2012. And when you participate, we’ll show our gratitude with…

 

  • The Largest Donation over $1,000 will spend the entire day in the Beautiful Napa Valley, enjoy a private winery tour and tasting, enjoy a lovely Balloon Ride over the valley, receive two tickets to attend the ESCAPE LIVE in February at the Historic Uptown Theatre (showcasing speakers all dedicated to our cause) and a follow up wine dinner with the ESCAPE participants. (value $10,000).

 

  • The Largest Donation over $500 will join us at our exclusive Luxury Liquid Assets Wine Tasting and Dinner event in Napa, California and receive a copy of the ESCAPE Teleseminar Series – Digital Edition. (value $1,000.00).

 

  • The first 20 donations over $250 or more will take a personal full day tour of Napa Valley with Napa Valley Adventure Tours. (value $500.00).

 

  • The first 20 donations over $100 or more will receive 2 bottles of Napa’s Fine Select wines shipped to you to enjoy for the holiday season.

 

  • Donations from $50 to $99 will receive our warmest gratitude and a Legacy 4 Kids Foundation ECHO Bracelet honoring Grandparents, Parents and Children we here at the Foundation are so pleased to serve.

 

  • Donations $10.00 to $49.00 will receive a listing on our new Contributors page on our new website at www.Legacy4Kids.org.

 

For clarification 88 cents of each dollar contributed goes to growing and sustaining the Legacy 4 Kids Foundation. Based on this contribution percentage formula the Legacy 4 kids Foundation is about to begin its 2nd year of operation. Your contribution will enable us to help more families and prevent teen crises.

 

We’re raising $15,000 in 15 days. (October 1st – October 15th)

 

Donate Now

 

In closing, no contribution is too small, and we’d be grateful if you will share this with your friends TODAY.

 

Please join with us to enable Legacy 4 Kids Foundation to assist more parents and their daughters to live a happy and successful lives without fear, and make 2012 something our girls can celebrate.

 

Thank you from the bottom of our hearts for helping us meet our 15 day goal and proving we can all make a difference by doing a small part.

 

Click on the DONATE NOW button on this page and give whatever you can, no amount is too small and share the link to this page with all people you know.

 

 

Divorced Parent Telesummit

Thursday, September 29th, 2011

Are you worried about your children and how they will adjust to the divorce? Are you dealing with a difficult ex? No money in your budget to attend expensive therapy or seminars? And never mind researching all the divorce experts out there to figure out where to put your precious time and money?!

If that’s you, then you will love the Divorced Parent Telesummit!

I know Pam Wynn and Shelley Greiser, co-hosts of the Divorced Parent Telesummit. Pam and Shelley have worked with hundreds of people who are going through or are already divorced. They are committed to helping you help your children and become a better divorced parent by providing you with solid tools. They both know what it’s like to be in your shoes because they’ve walked a thousand miles in those shoes.

Like Pam and Shelley, I want you to have every advantage, every strategy, and every bit of information that will ensure your success.

Pam and Shelley have lined up divorce experts for the Divorced Parent Telesummit. Many of the experts were just like you. These experts have developed effective methods to ensure your children do well through the divorce transition and to deal with difficult ex’es. These experts will share information, tips and proven strategies on how to deal with a difficult ex and raise happy, healthy children despite a difficult ex. All you need is a phone. And best of all…it’s FREE to listen!

Register now to attend the Divorced Parent Telesummit.

The Divorced Parent Telesummit runs from Monday through Thursday for two weeks, starting September 26, 2011. You and the experts come together via a telephone conference (with an optional webcast) to learn proven strategies to help your kids and deal with a difficult ex. And don’t worry, if you cannot attend all the sessions, you can get the replays.

This virtual event is for you if:

  • You are struggling with co-parenting issues
  • You are worried about your child’s adjustment to the divorce
  • You are dealing with a “difficult” ex
  • You don’t know how to answer your child’s questions about the divorce
  • You don’t know how to form a co-parenting team with your ex
  • You want your children to be happy despite the divorce

Go to the Divorced Parent Telesummit website to find out more about this FREE event. The experts at the Divorced Parent Telesummit are going to discuss important topics such as:

  • Unplugging From Your Ex & Avoiding Emotional Minefields
  • Keeping it Together When You Are Parenting Apart
  • Mastering a Child-Centered Divorce
  • Developing a Winning Co Parenting Team
  • Raising Happier Kids Despite a Difficult Ex

You won’t want to miss out on a single Divorced Parent Telesummit expert. I’ll be there…see you at the Divorced Parent Telesummit!

Register now to attend the Divorced Parent Telesummit.

And again, it’s 100% free to listen. All these experts lined up for you, and you don’t have to drive anywhere. You can even upgrade to a Silver or Gold and own all the recordings and bonuses.

Sincerely, Kelly Marquet-Bodio

P.S. I’m attending the Divorced Parent Telesummit because I see the tremendous value in these topics! See you at the Divorced Parent Telesummit!

Register now to attend the Divorced Parent Telesummit.


divorced parent information


Growing Yourself as a Parent

Monday, July 4th, 2011

“Grown-ups never understand anything for themselves, and it is tiresome

for children to be always and forever explaining things to them.”

—Antoine de Saint-Exupery, The Little
Prince

Imagine a baby shower where the guests bring a special kind
of gift for the new parents.
Not baby clothes. Not strollers or cribs. Not even a single
book on child-rearing.

The gifts for the new parents? Self-awareness, self-love and
self-growth as a person, as well as a parent.

The best parenting requires that we not only work to nurture
and care for our children but that we nurture and care for ourselves.

Parenting is one of the—if not the—most challenging jobs on
the planet. There is the awesome responsibility of raising and guiding another
human being, of course. But it’s the daily interactions between children and
parents that can require almost super-human amounts of flexibility, patience
and awareness. All the experts and all the books aren’t there when it’s your
toddler who won’t nap, your child who stole a valued toy from his best friend,
your depressed teen who is desperately searching for answers, your adult child
who can’t hold down a job, or the dreaded unplanned pregnancy of your teen.

Successful—even joyful—parenting is about listening to
ourselves as well as listening to our children. It’s a hands-off approach that
brings the focus back to what we are feeling and experiencing, so that we don’t
unthinkingly rain anger and fear down upon our children. Being aware of
ourselves helps us develop a strong “inner authority” or an intuitive sense of
knowing what is best for us and our children in any moment. (And accepting that
sometimes we really don’t know yet!)
“We guide (our children) not because they have basically
shabby motives, but because they lack the one strength most of us have:
awareness of the world,” write authors Hugh and Gayle Prather in their book, Spiritual Parenting: A Guide to
Understanding and Nurturing the Heart in Your Child.

Their book calls parenting a spiritual path that helps us
grow as people while we are helping our children grow into adults. Our children
challenge us and if we can truly listen, we can grow.

One of the first challenges is to understand that old
patterns—often formed in our own childhoods—can often rule our behavior as
parents right now. For example, if our own parents tried to fix everything that
went wrong, we may try to do the same with our children. But our children may
need us just to listen to their fears and not jump in with our own fears and
try to “fix” it all.
In the process, we allow our kids to make mistakes, and that
means we can, too. And if we can forgive our kids and accept them in all their
flawed glory, it can’t be too big a jump to do this for ourselves.

As author Joyce Maynard writes, “It’s not only children who
grow. Parents do, too. As much as we watch to see what our children do with
their lives, they are watching us to see what we do with ours. I can’t tell my
children to reach for the sun. All I can do is reach for it myself.”

Author’s content used under license, © 2008 Claire
Communications

 

Britney Spears on Good Morning America

Tuesday, March 29th, 2011

I just watched this beautiful girl dance (gyrate) and sing the most insipid non-inspiring songs and get huge applause. I don’t know about you, but I don’t want my little girl to admire a young woman who sings songs with the lyrics “I can be your treble if you can be my base…make it bigger, make it bigger”! All while inviting both men and women to her crotch on stage.

She is a beautiful girl. There is no denying that. But is is obvious to me she is still hurt and wounded. Far from being ready to take the stage again. I was terribly disappointed in the performance. I thought it was vulgar and inept.

Come on everybody. I know she has been through a lot, but this is not what we want our young girls to be aspiring to! I thought during her absence in the spotlight she was getting her life back and re-branding herself. Becoming a young women who can prove to others who have made mistakes that you can grow up and be someone to look up to and inspire young women to make a change as well.

Good God, this woman is a MOM! What do you suppose her young ones will grow up to be like. I hope not their Mommy!

Did you get a chance to watch it? What did you think? Would you allow your kids to attend a Britney Spears concert or performance?

Would You Qualify?

Wednesday, March 23rd, 2011

Parents Needed, only those qualified need apply: 

Responsibilities:

Daily physical care of the child. This care may change at various stages. At all ages this care will include providing:

• Well-balanced, nutritional meals and assurance that the child eats sufficiently to meet his/her growth needs.

• Clothing and footware appropriate for the season and occasion.

• Shelter that is safe and comfortable.

• Medical care: preventive with annual check-ups and immunizations; responsive when the child is sick.

• Assurance that the child is receiving sufficient sleep to remain healthy and responsive.

• Toileting issues in infancy and toddlerhood. (Frequent, responsive diapering until the child is toilet trained. Assistance and support until toilet training is mastered).

• Nurturing responsibilities include encouragement, comforting, consistency, establishment of a sense of security, dependability, playing, counseling, and loving.

• Discipline issues include understanding and setting appropriate limits for age, consistency of expectations and responses, self-management of anger, being a good example.

• Education issues include providing a traditional education through a school or in the home. Non-academic education includes teaching independent life skills (dressing, hygiene, decision-making, social skills, physical fitness and sports, manners, and responsibility) that are appropriate at each age.

• Moral guidance includes teaching right from wrong and enforcing rules. Monitoring child’s activities to assure they are appropriate, including previewing and at times censoring reading material, television, computer games, movies, and friends. Providing clear and consistent limits for behavior that are age appropriate and that respond to the individual child’s maturity level.

• Spiritual guidance includes instilling in the child a sense of hope and well-being.

• Other responsibilities include: chauffeur, social director, scheduler, advocate, and manager.

Time requirements:

• 24 hours a day, seven days a week until the child can make it on his/her own

• No vacation time

• No sick leave

• Time off only when a suitable substitute has been found                          

Qualifications include:

• Sense of humor

• High self-esteem

• Selflessness

• Emotional maturity

• Financial security

• Dependable support system

• Energetic, trust in judgment

• General understanding of the needs of children

• Diplomatic

• Consistent

• Dependable

• Loving

• Able to make an 18+ year commitment

Benefits:

• Unconditional love of a child

• The knowledge that you are guiding a child to become a healthy, happy, productive member of society

Compensation:

• Love

• Satisfaction of a job well-done

Is everyone entitled to be a parent?

Tuesday, October 5th, 2010

I was a teen parent myself. I was pregnant at 17 and I gave birth to my daughter 3 weeks after becoming an “adult” at eighteen. I married her father, I was lucky. I personally had a tremendous amount of support from his parents as well as my own mother. My little girl did not suffer from a lack of love or support. I have many to thank for this. I could not have done it on my own. However, not every teen parent is so lucky, and by all means, not every child born to a teen parent as privileged as my daughter was growing up. My mother and father-in- law stepped in big time. It wasn’t easy for me as a young woman to allow for their opinions or their rules at times. However, I knew it was in my daughter’s best interest. I knew it was right for her.  

I made mistakes, but the biggest one is how little time I actually spent with my little girl when she was a toddler. I was working, I was busy…blah, blah, blah…none of it really matters, what she needed was her mom. When I look back now especially after raising my granddaughter today, I try to remember the ‘ first times’ of my daughters. I didn’t get to see so many of them. My Mother-in-law did. I was so stressed about being appreciated at work, money and other nonsense that I didn’t understand how very important it is to be appreciated at home.

The repercussions show themselves today. It is too late to fix them. Now my daughter and I must move forward and accept the mistakes and honor each other from today forward. Kids need their parents to be both physically and emotionally present. If this is something you are unable to accomplish, think twice before getting pregnant or choosing to raise a child without recourses. There are many families out there desperate for a child to love and they have the recourses to contribute to their upbringing.  Consider the child, their loneliness and sense of where they fit in this world if you choose to raise a child without the nessessary funds and time to contribute to him/her. Family is a BIG word. It has real meaning. A family is not just the birthparents, but the individuals that care and love the child each and every moment of every day. It isn’t all about money. It is about contributing to the daily mentoring and raising of a little person. Including the scrapes, bruises AND the successes and cheers.

I see a lot of families struggling with the effects of unplanned pregnancies. What we must remember, is how will the baby make out? It is no longer us as the Parents that matter now. It is the unborn child. Will we be able to give this little one everything he/she deserves? This baby did not ask to be brought into a difficult situation.

Children need a lot of ‘things’, but what they need most is love, consistency and security. Many of our children today are living in “survival mode”. They live hand to mouth and rely on the school system for “meals”, which many of us know lack a great deal in themselves. Kids are not sure of tomorrow. They don’t know if they will have a home to go to at the end of every day. They consistently see struggle and fear in their parent’s eyes.

Parents spend so much time working, trying to find work, paying bills, looking for ways to keep lights on and food on the table, which the actual raising of their kids is on the back burner. This is leading to a legacy of hell for our children. They learn life lessons from TV, video games, MTV, the streets and other unfortunate kids. Their idea of exercise is Xbox. Kids are learning early that life is a struggle. Their mindset is on negativity and fear at such a young age, they don’t understand what it means to wake up peaceful and be grateful for the upcoming day, looking for ways to contribute to our society and their own self worth.

If we as parents keep allowing for this to happen, our future for our kids and ourselves is bleak. How would you like your future leaders to have had TeenMom and Lindsey Lohan as role models? (and they are on the upside). It is up to us. We must change our way of thinking in order to make a difference for our kids.

Before the American family became so fragmented our children had a sense of place. They knew what was expected of them. They understood right from wrong. It is time we get back to that.  We must start putting our children first.

Our mindset must change from that of lack, frustration and blame to a mindset of love, honor, courage and grace. We must realize that in order to make a change in our lives, we must be the change.

The time has come for all of us to step up and be the change we expect in everybody else. No more blame, no more negativity or finger pointing. Change yourself, your outlook, and your expectations.

Live in excellence, and let’s teach our children to expect nothing less.

Can Mother's and Daughter's be Bestfriends?

Wednesday, September 8th, 2010

A recent article in the Wall Street Journal by Amy Chozick, How Parents Became Cool, describes the parental paradigm shift (as seen on TV) from loving but firm (think: The Brady Bunch) to best friends (think: Pretty Little Liars). We’ve all heard stories of (and some of us have witnessed up close) moms who are trying so desperately to be cool that they opt for the role of BFFs to their daughters instead of moms. It’s an easy line to cross; after all, every woman wants another friend—and moms, especially, want to connect with their teens and tweens and not be thought of as old hags. But can a mother be a daughter’s best friend?

Apropos of Mother’s Day, I asked my colleagues, Linda Perlman Gordon and Susan Morris Shaffer, authors of Too Close for Comfort: Questioning the Intimacy of Today’s Mother-Daughter Relationship (Berkley, 2009) to address that question in a guest post. Here is what Gordon and Shaffer had to say:
There is an old Chinese proverb that states “One Generation plants the trees; another gets the shade,” and this is how it should be with mothers and daughters. The intimate nature of the relationship between a mother and daughter is sometimes confusing. If close, the relationship can simulate friendship through the familiar characteristics of empathy, listening, loyalty, and caring. However, the mother/daughter relationship has unique characteristics that distinguish it from a best friendship. These characteristics include a mother’s role as primary emotional caretaker, a lack of reciprocity, and a hierarchy of responsibility. This hierarchy, combined with unconditional love, precludes mothers and daughters from being best friends.

Because the essential ingredient for friendship is equality and there is always an imbalance when one person in the twosome is the parent of the other, mothers and daughters naturally can’t be best friends. Marina, 27 years old says, “I love spending time with my mom, but I wouldn’t consider her my best friend. She’s MY MOM. Best friends don’t pay for the dress you covet in a trendy clothing store that you wouldn’t pay for yourself. Best friends don’t pay for your wedding. Best friends don’t remind you how they carried you in their body and gave you life, and sometime gas! Best friends don’t tell you how wise they are and trump your opinion because they have been alive at least 20 years longer than you. I love my mom, and I want her to remain a mom.”

This doesn’t mean that the mother/daughter relationship can’t be very close and satisfying. While some adult relationships are still troubled, many find them to be extremely rewarding. So many moms spoke to us about how happy they are to be finished with the “eye rolling” and look from their adolescent daughters, a look that says, “You must come from a different evolutionary chain than me.” Daughters also adopted the famous Mark Twain quote about aging, with some slight alterations, and their feelings about their mothers. Mark Twain said, “When I was a boy (girl) of 14, my father (mother) was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man (woman) around. But when I got to be 21, I was astonished at how much the old man (woman) had learned in seven years.”

This generation of mothers and adult daughters has a lot in common which increases the likelihood of shared companionship. Mothers and daughters have always shared the common experience of being homemakers, responsible for maintaining and passing on family values, traditions, and rituals. Today contemporary mothers and daughters also share the experience of the workforce, technology and lack of a generation gap, which may bring them even closer together.

Best friends may or may not continue to be best friends, but for better or worse, the mother and daughter relationship is permanent, even if for some unfortunate reason they aren’t’ speaking. The mother and child relationship is, therefore, more intimate and more intense than any other. As long as that hierarchy exists, it’s not an equal relationship. Daughters should not feel responsible for their mother’s emotional well-being. Not that they don’t care deeply about their mothers, it’s just that they shouldn’t be burdened with their mother’s well being. As one mother said to her daughter, “I would gladly dive under a bus for you and there is no way that I’m diving under a bus for my friends.” Her daughter responded, “And I’d gladly let you dive under the bus to save me!”

The mother/daughter relationship is so much more comprehensive than a best friendship. It’s a relationship that is not replaceable by any other. This unique bond doesn’t mean that when daughters mature they can’t assume more responsibilities and give back to their mothers, but it’s never equal and it’s not supposed to be. Mothers never stop being mothers, which includes frequently wanting to protect their daughters and often feeling responsible for their happiness. Mother always “trumps” friend.

Dr. Blaise approves, do you

Sunday, August 15th, 2010

Dr. Blaise Ryan, the chief child behavioral researcher at Child Brain Health Research Institute says: “I recommend this program to parents that want a happier and more cooperative child.” 

If you have ever felt frustrated that your child doesn’t listen to you, and you wish you knew how to get your child to be more cooperative and behave better, then read this groundbreaking guide, make sure you get it now and read it very carefully… 

It has transformed worked for countless families to turn mis-behavior into great behavior. 

Click here to get it: The Happy Child Guide  

 

This program is parent-tested and doctor-approved. Try it. You have nothing to lose but those annoying behaviors. You know the ones: 

-Yelling
-Whining
-Defiance
-Arguing 

Help end these issues with methods that work. 

Now you can get some helpful tips get your child to behave better. 

Click on this link to read how it works: 

Go to: The Happy Child Guide

To your family!

Kelly Marquet-Bodio